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I just tried one of those new Hot Pocket Pepperoni and Three Cheese Calzones.  The commercials always make it look good.  I don’t like their Pepperoni Pizza Hot Pocket but I thought maybe this “Italian Style Herbed Cheese Crust” might make the difference.  Um…no.  The sauce is still atrocious, I mean you truly can’t get more bland than that.  Well, there is taste but it tastes like liquid italian salt.  The pepperoni is bland as well and I tasted the crust on its own and it tasted neither cheesy nor herbed.  And because I was an idiot and didn’t read the label before I ate it, it counted as 2 servings so it was like eating 2 hot pockets calorie wise…620 calories and 1700mg of sodium!!!  Not a happy girl.  So for anyone who may have been curious about the calzone, don’t be.  Stick with any flavor Hot Pocket but “Italian.”

Nutritional Info per serving (2 servings per “pocket”):
310 calories
15g fat
6g sat fat
Cholesterol 25mg
Sodium  850mg
Total Carbs  33g
Dietary Fiber 3g
Sugars  6g
Protein  11g
Vitamin A  2%
Calcium  20%
Iron  10%

I loved the I Love the 70’s/80’s series from VH1 because it brought back so many memories of toys, games and overall a good nostalgia factor.  They could continue to produce I love the 80’s, the Strikes Back sequel and the trilogy 3D because there was just so much that couldn’t be covered from fads to songs to tv shows and so on.  When the 90’s version came along, you could see a shift.  It wasn’t quite as happy in nature and this is the decade I graduated high school so yes, I remember things weren’t as shiny and gawdy as they were in the 80’s but it was a little unsettling to see it in a time capsule like that.

Enter the “I Love the New Millenium” series which still has 2 years they couldn’t cover because they jumped the gun.  I don’t remember seeing toys or anything having to do with things that make children happy as the 70’s/80’s editions did for me and the hubby.  Some of it was inaccurate as well.  The one that springs to mind is that the Geico Caveman commericals started in 2004, not 2007.  HELLO!?!  Not that hard to check people.  The TV SHOW that they butchered was in 2007 but they didn’t even mention it.  WTF?  It was also friggin DEPRESSING to watch the downfall of society.  I’m sure the biggest reason there wasn’t a big nostalgia factor was because the people who produced this show are in their late 20’s and 30’s so they have no clue what a kid of say 15 would look back on with nostalgia when they were 7.  This would also have their whole panel (many of whom I like, a few that are grating) in a cynical pissing match because they couldn’t relate to those things.  Instead the 00’s were looked back upon from the perspective of an adult and was just a recap of stories we were thankful to finally stop hearing about and there was little to gleefully shout “I remember that!” with fondness of a time long passed.  Because it’s 7 years to 6 months old!!!!  Why the hell would you jump the gun on producing these?  All it made us want to do is turn off the tv and play with our Barbie’s or GI Joes.  I can’t wait to see 2008’s version…

“I Love the New Millenium”  2008…the year that foreclosures were the highest ever, gas was so expensive people were choosing whether to pay utilities or gas in the tank to get to their jobs that are now barely worth it because the cost of groceries has gone up 20-40% while salaries are staying the same and when we blamed the government, oil companies and not the speculators for driving the price of oil through the roof.  Yay.

We live in a ‘burb but just far enough away from tornado sirens that it wouldn’t wake us in the middle of the night.  (I can’t imagine too many people would wake unless they’re right next door to it or they’re light sleepers)  Because there has been a rash of weird weather this year, we decided to invest in a weather radio.  You know the one thing you always say you should get once bad weather passes and never do? 

I love the one we got by First Alert.  It has S.A.M.E. technology and you can program what alerts you receive.  Like we don’t need to know if a typhoon is coming because we’re not in an area that gets them but we do live in an area that sees tornados so we programmed to be alerted when a tornado warning is issued.  Now it does have watch and warning lights on the unit that will blink as long as they are active or until you click to read them and then they’ll go solid and turn off when the alert expires.  You can choose 2 types of alerts, either a full on alarm that continues to go off or an alarm goes off for 10 seconds followed by a voice alert that reads the bulletin from the National Weather Service.  Of course when you set it up you never know if it works or not until you have the particular alert you chose.  Last night at 11:30pm, our tornado warning went off just as we were heading up to bed.  We never would’ve known because we just turned off a movie we were watching.  So down to the basement we went with it and watched the local news until it passed at 12:30am.  That paid for itself in that one use because while we had no touchdowns, there were funnel clouds and some that popped up with little warning at all and we were already in the basement when they did.  If you’ve been putting off buying a weather radio no matter where you live, you should invest in one.  I highly recommend the one we bought and it’s not very expensive at all.  (And because it’s over $25 with Amazon, shipping is free!)

I’m a fan of Italian subs and I’m always up for trying someplace new.  Our friends told us Penn Station subs were really good.  So we drove about 20 minutes away to the closest one to us.  I stayed in the car while the manus went inside.  I asked for a small Italian sub and fries and asked for ketchup.  He got a chicken cordon bleu.  I’m all for freshness and such but he was in there long enough for them to kill, cure, slice and cook the animals as well as grow the potatoes.  Halfway to our destination to “picnic” he tells me he forgot ketchup and got me a regular sized sub.  It put a twist in the underoos.  It took 3 bites before I could get to the meat.  Then when I did I regretted it.  I don’t purposely eat salted foods, I mean I know sodium is in everything but I don’t use salt.  It tasted like a salt lick.  I couldn’t even eat all of it.  I had a fry and they were fine but I still had said knot in underoos so I kept them in the bag.  Hubby said he’s never had a more tasteless sub in his life.  We both got their “fresh squeezed” lemonade and it was good and tart.  (Think a tart lemon shake up from a fair)  So $21 later we crossed another place off our list of places to go.

I was excited to try the new Burger King Steakhouse Burger because it looked so good on their commercials. Seen ‘em? No? Well regardless I think you should go to BK’s website so you can see what they tell you you’re going to see. Really, click the link, I’ll wait…

Looks good doesn’t it? Wanna see what it really looks like when you actually go get it?

Is it me or does that not quite look like the luscious Angus burger they’ve been promoting?? Now how does it taste? You like salsbury steak? You know, the stuff in TV dinners you might’ve eaten as a kid? Then you’ll like this burger. If not, you might want to steer clear. The pic is of hubby’s “loaded” Steakhouse burger. Loaded means they puree some kind of potato mixture and slather it on the bun and add some limp, chewy bacon to the regular burger which includes the “Thick and Hearty” A1 sauce (which is like Heinz 57), cheese and these “crunchy onions”. Now let me tell you about these onions. You know the reconstituted onions Mickey D’s uses for their cheeseburgers? It’s like BK took those and batter fried them. They’re so small you can’t even tell they’re there. You can see them if you look REAL close on the pics.  On the regular burger they don’t list it but there is mayo all over it and for a non-mayo girl, this was an unwelcome surprise.  I ate just over half of mine before I threw it and the pathetic tater sticks they call fries went back to the bag from wence they came.  I’d write more but my stomach is now churning so I’m going to lay down.

As a renter of vacation homes, I use the things I see “wrong” with places as a reference of what to get right should we decide to go into the same business.  There is one glaring thing that irritates me to no end and when I mentioned this to a friend of mine she said she wouldn’t even rent a place missing this item…window coverings. 

Now I know you may have a fabulous view of a lake, woods, beach or whatever and I don’t care how secluded you claim your rental is I don’t care to parade around at night with no option to shut the blinds.  I mean what view would it be impeding to have blinds completely open during the day?  We stayed at a place that was darn near perfect except the fact that the only place there were blinds was in the downstairs bedroom and the bathroom.  I mean I don’t assume people are lurking out in the woods looking in windows but the fact is, I don’t know.  We’ve stayed in places where other cabins surrounded us or it was acres of woods with trails skirting by the house that were open to anyone staying in the cabins so yes, the possibility exists as far as I’m concerned. 

Owners…blinds are CHEAP and I’ve stayed at rentals from Hawaii to Ohio that have had this issue.  I’m sure people’s stays were lovely with or without window coverings which is why it’s never mentioned in comments in the guest book but I’m here saying what I know others haven’t…stick up some blinds on your windows!  I don’t need Bambi or some hilljack seeing me in my skivvies!

This weekend we decided to make our food choices based around some new products that came out. I can honestly say I should get paid for this given some of the things I had to eat or at minimum reimbursed.

KFC’s Smoky Chipotle 2 pc meal. We were both really looking forward to this because it harkened us back to the days of Sisters Chicken and Biscuits Spicy Chicken from our childhood. We should’ve known KFC would screw it up. First off just the name alone is annoying because there’s a big “chipotle” craze sweeping this nation and KFC thought it would be lucrative to cash in on that craze. The texture of the chicken breading looked promising, as it was a darker red color in comparison to its Crispy and Original Recipe counterparts. It took quite a few bites before we even tasted any flavor much less a hint of smoky anything. For anyone who likes spicy food, you’ll laugh heartily at this weak attempt at adding “smoky chipotle” to expand their menu. I won’t even go into their generous 3 tablespoon portion of macaroni and cheese being congealed yet again. I’d love their schedule as to when they make fresh mac and cheese but that is obviously rare these days. Overall, stick to the tried and true chicken if you’re a KFC fan because this new addition is a definite miss.

Arby’s Texas Toast Sandwich Meal. Should I be worried when I don’t even find the item that’s been hyped on TV all week on their online menu? The answer is yes. This is a Texas Toast roast beef sandwich and I got the double cheese. First off, the cheese sauce is just gross. Tastes as artificial as it is. Second, when the words Texas Toast are in the title, I expect to get both pieces toasted not one pathetically toasted on one side and the other piece plain. If I wanted roast beef on square Wonder bread, I can make that at home thanks. I’m not a fan of the curly fries either and them being ice cold at 11:30am when your lunch rush starts doesn’t make me anymore of a fan. I took two bites of each and threw it all away. The best thing I got from them was the drink. So there’s $4 down the drain.

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We’ve been eagerly awaiting the debut of this new series and not for the reasons you think.  The perfect prelude to watching this show is having watched the Sex: The Revolution series on VH1.  I was born in the mid 70’s and before watching that a month ago, I had no idea just how stifled sexuality really was and the fights for your rights to do as you please behind closed doors even when I was born.  I took things like birth control, having whatever kind of sex you wanted and porn for granted.  Because let’s face it, if you were a kid in the early 80’s, you kept hearing so much about this “Skinemax” (Cinemax) and you knew you wanted to sneak a peek.

Swingtown follows Susan and Bruce Miller and their 2 children who move a few blocks away.  Bruce seems eager to leave behind his old neighbors especially his wife’s best friend and uber uptight Janet and her husband Roger who has seemingly given up on happiness due to his wife’s frigid nature.   The Millers are greeted by sexy swingers Tom and Trina Decker who invite them to a party their first night in town.  When Janet and Roger stop by unexpectedly with Tupperware in hand, Susan invites them to come with them to the party.  Trina and Tom separately talked to Bruce and Susan casually bringing up that most people there were in open marriages and then Trina introduces Susan to Quaaludes.  Feelin’ no pain, Susan finds Bruce and they discuss what was just said to them and seem intrigued.  When straight laced Janet is sent to the “playroom” in the basement by a conniving Trina, she freaks and insists everyone leaves.  Bruce and Susan decline and say they’re staying.  Janet grabs Roger and storms out.  Cue the music…bow chicka bow bow and off the swingers go to welcome their new neighbors in a rather intimate way. 

Now the show is not exclusively about the sex.  There are subplots involving the children like their teen daughter who has a stoner boyfriend with limited brain cells in reserve but she has a crush on her summer school teacher.  Their son who has come in contact with a mysterious neighbor girl who was living in their house before they moved in and is eager to run away…from what has yet to be revealed.  He is also friends with Janet and Roger’s son who has lied saying he has made out with a girl at school who later finds him and gives him the beating of his life in public.  Right on sister!   So there is a balance between family life and life after dark.

This was a real trip for us because I saw shoes I used to have, some of the outfits look very similar to what my parents wore when they were in school, the soundtrack is wonderful and the overall attention to detail is spot on.  This is no surprise given Alan Poul of HBO’s Six Feet Under is involved which is a big plus because he is amazing!  We were surprised that Swingtown was not put on a premium channel because it seems you could have the kind of freedom that would be needed for a show with this kind of subject matter.  We’ll see if that ends up hurting them in the end.  We think it could be very possible if this show is too “risque” for the white bread audiences that CBS’s sister channel Showtime could pick it up.  This is definitely a show we’ll be watching for as long as it lasts.  I say that because I’m just waiting for people who 1) are all uptight writing in saying its inappropriate 2) don’t get that the show isn’t promoting swinging but rather looking back at a point in time when this was not unusual  3) people who don’t get the 70’s and spend their time criticizing the styles, music, lingo, etc.

For us, it’s a refreshing departure from yet another cop/crime show that seems to be saturating the prime time market. 

I have to say I was really rooting for Dwayne Johnson’s marriage to succeed.  She’d been with him since college, loved him when he had nothing and loved him when he had everything.  They share a beautiful daughter Simone together whom it is very obvious he adores because his face lights up when he talks about her in interviews.  But the pressures of Hollywood, a hectic schedule and the like I’m sure finally took their toll.

Dwayne and Dany are still on good terms and I thought I read still in business together.  (She’s a financial advisor)  He said he calls her his “sexy exey.”  LOL  What impressed me the most is that Dany is not requesting alimony from Dwayne.  Given his income and investments, she could’ve easily asked for it which disputes any “gold digger” claims jealous Dwayne fans may have had.  What is quite evident from reading the divorce papers is that Dwayne and Dany have the best interest of their daughter at heart. Included is a clause that encourages love and affection and will not allow the other parent or anyone else to make a negative comment about the other parent in the presence of their daughter.  Each parent is also paying $5,000/mo into a trust for her to cover her college expenses. 

Kudos to the Johnson/Garcia’s for showing that not all divorces have to be painful and ugly and for thinking of the most important thing you two ever created…your child.

If you go to the websites of some of your favorite restaurants to peruse their menus, you may be missing out on some ways to get freebies from them.  Many restaurants have little clubs that you can sign up for and a lot of them will give you a free appetizer or dessert for joining.  The ones that have you enter your birthday will usually send you a coupon for money off or a free meal or dessert. 

One of the best ones out there is Max and Erma’s Good Neighbor card and you’ll get certain free items typically over the summer.  A lot of times it coaxes us over there when we wouldn’t have normally gone.  We’ve signed up for a ton of them like Dairy Queen’s Blizzard Club, On the Border, O’Charleys, Champps, Potbelly Sandwiches, TGIFridays and others.  In this day and age where it seems that everything is shooting through the roof, why not put up with a stray email here and there to save some dough when you do go out?  You could even set up a free mail account specifically for those kinds of sign ups if you don’t want to receive them in your own mail though I’ve never had a problem with a particular restaurant overdoing it on the frequency of emails.

As we speak, the other half is getting our free Wild West Shrimp appetizer from Longhorn!  (It’s also a great way to try appetizers you may not normally have spent your own money on!)  You should note that some places will give you a time limit for your “welcome” coupon, usually 2 weeks, so plan to sign up when you’re ready to make a trip to that restaurant.